Winners Of The "Sword Of My Mouth" Caption Contest

Comic book writer Jim Munroe just judged our caption contest from Monday, and reported that it was "super fuckin fun." We've got all ten winners below!


The contest, if you recall, was to add dialogue to the above image by Shannon Gerard, taken from forthcoming comic Sword Of My Mouth. And here are Munroe's picks for the winners. Winners, please email Jim Munroe to get your free copy of the comic book.

WINNER: Xerendian (A free paper book for the winner!)

Beardy Guy: "Slip me some skin, brother!"

Waistcoat Guy: "Alas, I cannot."

Runners Up: (All get a free ebook)


Vest guy- Those X-ray glasses are only ten bucks.

Hat guy- I'll give you five. . . Reply


"I lost both arms as a kid, but check out the new ones! Doc says they'll
be fully developed by the end of the week!"

"Boy, stem-cell research has really advanced since those 144,000
assholes disappeared!"

Katayev Katayev

"Those splitcock fools think they hard? They're not hard. This is hard."

"Yeah but what's it look like once you hit forty? Fake prison tats, I'm
telling you, the worse they get the better." Reply



Taller Guy: "What do you think - pound and a half to two pounds gone?"

Shorter Guy: "Hard to tell, but Shylock definitely overcharged you for
that suit."



"I'm so indecisive. I just can't decide on metal-monster hands or
fish-scale merman hands."
"Dude, could you please repeat that, and talk into my palmera, I am
livecasting this."



"As you can see I have nothing up my sleeves..."

"Or your vest... where are your legs?"


"Think of it like wearing the most comfortable pair of gloves ever... I
literally... NEVER have to wash my hands"


"... you... still do though... right?"


"...and when I got to the pearly gates, St. peter made me leave my
sleeves outside. Turns out God doesn't like body modification after


"Good think I'm a heathen then, my Prince Albert would have hurt like


"What Amendment was that about baring arms?"

"Uh...the Fifth?"

Geoffrey Clouser

"They worked me to the bones"

"Yeah, well they crucified me"!


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