I've never adored and simultaneously abhorred something as much as this week's American Horror Story: Asylum. After a long vacation from watching Santa screaming about bringing rape down the chimney, the drama has returned with... well, more rape and a fun little song. So let's watch what happens when American Horror Story channels Glee.

Spoilers ahead...

After the last episode, coyly titled "THE COAT HANGER," spent most of the hour focused on imprisoned Lana and her DIY abortion kit, I had just about had it with this show and its delight in torturing women for entertainment. Is there a single woman on this show who hasn't been abused, raped, tortured or murdered? Were all of the women on this show just playthings for men to have sex with and kill? Even Grace was doomed by the touch of Kit's love rod. It was exceptionally disheartening to head into the new year with all this violence. And for what? Entertainment? I'm not so sure.


I was plenty ready to wash my hands of this series, and then I watched "The Name Game." Now I'm not sure what to think. Between Pepper finally telling Dr. Arden to just fuck right off and this singalong, I got hooked again. This doesn't mean I'm happy with the show as a whole, but the crazy got me. Or maybe it was the gifs of Kit and Lana doing their little dance. If this recap is a bit muddled, apologies — I'm still processing.

One very important thing happened last night: The writers killed off two dangling plots that were seemingly going nowhere. The Possession and the Nazi plot are O-V-E-R. Burned to smithereens in the crematorium. Good riddance to Dr. Arden and his experiments, which were as about as well thought out as his character's purpose. However, I will miss Lily Rabe and her acting talents immensely.

But Sister Eunice and Dr. A weren't going to go out quietly into the boil-faced, zombie night. These two made their goodbyes last. First, by shocking Sister Jude into thinking she's trapped on stage forever dancing to the "Name Game" by pummeling her brain with blots of electricity. And second, by stealing the Monsignor's "virtue."


And by virtue I mean: The Devil raped Joseph Fiennes. I hope none of you had to watch this scene with other people around. I'm not really sure why it was necessary to rape Monsignor. I shudder to think that somewhere out there someone thinks sexually violating a male character justifies all the other previous assaults on female characters — and Jeebus, I hope that's not the case. At the end of the day, there's been A LOT of rape on this show, and I'm not really sure why. The Monsignor was already quite aware that Sister Eunice was bad news, after the Angel of Death explicitly told him Sister Eunice was possessed. I could have lived 1,000 lives and happily not seen any of this (including the scenes where Dr. Thredson was on top of Lana in his basement). So I guess this was used for shock appeal, and that just makes me so terribly sad. All of it.

On a more symbolic level, did anyone think about how just before this assault the Monsignor had been crucified by the apparently exceptionally strong Ian McShane? I wonder if this was a direct nod to The Exorcist scene with Regan and the crucifix? Maybe, humph.


Thankfully I have a dance-off and Pepper, to keep our minds off the other things. With the Nun dead and the Nazi gone, all we have now are our aliens. A collection of aliens who just want to raise babies super fast in the bellies of women that Kit has touched with his wang. What a good plan, aliens. The return of the space beasts also introduced the new Pepper. The former pinhead has been given the gift of excellent gab, and uses it to verbally castrate Arden. It was delightful. Anyone else notice the theremin WAILING in the background. Subtle hint, American Horror Story.

Also great in this episode, the rock-out moment. Now that Sister Jude's mind is fried, I fully expect every single episode until the finale to contain a song. My first reaction to the singalong was "NO NO NO." Then slowly it became "YES YES YES."


In conclusion, the patients of Braircliff seem to be no better off, now that Dr. Thredson is in charge. So too bad there, but I'm sure an alien will come in and rape everyone into another storyline. Unfortunately the aliens are the least exciting part of this series, but who knows what will happen next week? Perhaps Lana will turn the tables on Thredson with her baby leverage. Anyone else think Grace's baby is the real future Bloodyface?