Vote 2020 graphic
Everything you need to know about and expect during
the most important election of our lifetimes

True Blood Goes Old Timey And Shows Civil War Sluts

Illustration for article titled True Blood Goes Old Timey And Shows Civil War Sluts

This week on True Blood, we journeyed back into vampire Bill's past and encountered some of the women who have wanted to sleep with him. And we heard some of the worst Civil War pick-up lines ever. Spoilers and dishing below.Sookie breaks things off with Bill, and quickie picks up with Sam as an escort to Bill's speaking engagement at the church. But besides all the mushy lovin' so-and-so, this was one of the first times we got to see a small society assimilate with their new vampire, which I really enjoyed. I particularly enjoyed the Iraq vet practically hugging poor Bill. As far as Bill's back story, I was mildly entertained, I just they would have lightened up on the gimmicks a little (the music and the flashback filters). And Now The Pros And Cons Of True Blood Pro: The way Bill says Sookie. It sounds like he's getting punched. Pro: Jason never saw that Tara was in love with him, I love this kid, he's an idiot. And then of course in order to fix his drug problem he does more drugs, stronger drugs. Which actually makes perfect sense for his character. Pro: The Civil War flash backs were pretty fun. I didn't expect actual period dress so I'll sign up. Pro: Vampires cry tears of blood, of course. Pro: Jason having sex with the tramp lady in the back of the bar. Really graphic, but I laughed out loud. If this is the way True Blood is going to deal with sex from now on, I totally welcome it.

Advertisement
Illustration for article titled True Blood Goes Old Timey And Shows Civil War Sluts

Pro: More hot were-collie spying action (hey at least he's not sniffing dead peoples sheets) Pro: Grandma is dead, yay — no more annoying lady. Pro: Sam finally got a personality, he was soooo pissed when Sookie rejected him. Hooray for for bringing something to the table besides the whole were-collie shtick, though frankly I didn't really buy his frat boy anger. Her should have tried to make her feel even worse for being such a fang-banger wannabe. Con: The fuzzy corners around the flashbacks and the voice over. They should have just done a cut scene.

Advertisement
Illustration for article titled True Blood Goes Old Timey And Shows Civil War Sluts

Con: Tara as a water nymph in Jason's fantasy, I don't see it. Con: Sookie looked less than attractive in this episode. Con: This pick up line:

Share This Story

Get our newsletter

DISCUSSION

Yeah, I pretty much agree with this review, but was the only one who liked the old lady? Both of the people I watched it with were genuinely disappointed that she died. I could have done without Tara the water nymph and honestly, fucking in the trash. I think this show is truly starting to pick up momentum.