This Week's TV: Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon Finally Gets a Sequel

Illustration for article titled This Weeks TV: iCrouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon/i Finally Gets a Sequel

Also this week: The X-Files concludes its mini-season! Vixen debuts on Arrow, The Flash fights King Shark, and Supergirl meets a major comics villain, Silver Banshee! All this, and Enrico Colantoni on iZombie! It’s all on This Week’s TV!


Supergirl (8PM, CBS)

Truth, Justice and the American Way

“Supergirl does battle with the deadly Master Jailer (Jeff Branson), who is hunting and executing escaped Fort Rozz prisoners. Also, Cat hires a second assistant, Siobhan Smythe (Italia Ricci), who immediately tries to one-up Kara, and Kara and James disagree over the DEO’s methods.”


Debut of Silver Banshee (yes!) and the Master Jailer! He has a LASER GUILLOTINE.

The X-Files (8PM, FOX)

My Struggle II

“The investigations that Mulder and Scully previously began with conspiracy theorist and web-TV show host Tad O’Malley (guest star Joel McHale) seem to have awakened powerful enemies. A widespread panic begins as people all over the country suddenly start falling gravely ill, and Scully must look within to try and find a cure. Meanwhile, Mulder confronts the man whom he believes to be behind it all, but another figure from Mulder and Scully’s past may prove to be the key to their salvation.”

Season finale! Features the return of the Cigarette Smoking Man and Agent Monica Reyes.

Lucifer (9PM, FOX)

Sweet Kicks

“After a shooting occurs at a fashion show and a young woman is killed, Lucifer becomes intrigued by the danger of the situation and begs Chloe to get in on the case. Meanwhile, when Maze admits to Amenadiel that she wants to go back to hell, he sets his sights on Dr. Linda.”


The Magicians (9PM, SYFY)

Impractical Applications

“The Brakebills Students must endure a series of magical trials, while Julia finds a powerful new ally.”


Lost Girl (10PM, SYFY)

Judgement Fae

“Bo tracks down an old foe who has taken on a new form.”

(It’s Hephaestus)

Also on Monday: Scorpion (9PM, CBS)


The Flash (8PM, CW)

King Shark

“When King Shark escapes from an A.R.G.U.S. holding tank, Lila (guest star Audrey Marie Anderson) and Diggle (David Ramsey) travel to Central City to warn The Flash (Grant Gustin). King Shark shows up at the West house and attacks Joe (Jesse L. Martin), Iris (Candice Patton), Wally (Keiynan Lonsdale) and Barry.”


“…an A.R.G.U.S. holding tank”.

The Muppets (8:30PM, ABC)

Little Green Lie

“Sparks fly when Kermit and Miss Piggy pretend that they are back together for the sake of Kermit’s impressionable nephew Robin. And now that Camilla is taking up all of Gonzo’s time, Pepe and Rizzo audition for a replacement wingman.”


iZombie (9PM, CW)

Eternal Sunshine of the Caffeinated Mind

“When an incredibly optimistic coffee-shop owner is murdered, Liv uses her sunny outlook to help Clive solve the murder. Meanwhile, things begin to go from bad to worse for Blaine, and Drake is forced to cancel plans with Liv due to a run in with Seattle’s finest.”


Enrico Colantoni guest stars!

Agent Carter (9PM, ABC)

The Edge of Mystery/A Little Song and Dance

“Peggy and Sousa propose a trade with Whitney Frost, while the SSR gets help from Howard Stark that may be the key to eliminating Zero Matter.”

“Peggy desperately tries to save Dr. Wilkes with a dangerous plan to stop Whitney Frost. But Thompson makes a surprising move that could destroy them all.”


Two episodes again this week—bad sign?

Also on Tuesday: Teen Wolf (9PM, MTV), Limitless (10PM, CBS), Shannara Chronicles (10PM, MTV)


Arrow (8PM, CW)


“Oliver realizes he needs help battling Darhk so he calls in an old friend - Vixen (guest star Megalyn E.K.). Using her magical ability to summon animal powers, Vixen gets a lock on Darhk’s location and the team goes to war. Meanwhile, Thea has a heart-to-heart talk with Malcolm.”


Vixen debuts!

Supernatural (9PM, CW)

Beyond the Mat

“Dean sees an obituary notice for a wrestler he and Sam used to watch when they were kids. Deciding they need a break from tracking the Darkness, the brothers decide to attend the funeral to pay their respects. The funeral is full of wrestlers, including Shawn Harley (guest star Mike “The Miz” Mizanin), a hot shot new wrestler with a fiery temper who pushes everyone’s buttons, and veteran wrestler Gunner Lawless (guest star Aleks Paunovic). Sam and Dean attend the next match to re-live one of their fondest childhood memories but when another wrestler turns up dead, playtime quickly turns to work.


Fresh from Scooby-Doo! Wrestlemania Mystery, “The Miz” guest stars.

Star Wars: Rebels (9PM, DISNEY XD)

The Honorable Ones

“Zeb and Agent Kallus find themselves stranded on an ice planet after a failed Imperial ambush of the rebels. With Kallus injured from the escape pod crash, he and Zeb must work together to survive the harsh conditions.”


Star Wars does Enemy Mine!

Also on Wednesday: Face Off (9PM, SYFY), Nova: Rise of the Robots (9PM, PBS), It’s Always Sunny in Philadelpha: Charlie Catches a Leprechaun (10PM, FXX), Suits (10PM, USA)


Legends of Tomorrow (8PM, CW)

Star City 2046

“When a malfunction sends the Waverider crashing into 2046 Star City, our heroes face a startling version of their own future where they never stop Savage (guest star Casper Crump) and never return home. The city is in ruins and overrun by criminals, which thrills Rory (Dominic Purcell). Sara (Caity Lotz) is despondent over the destruction of her home and stunned when she learns what happened to her old friend, Oliver Queen (guest star Stephen Amell).”


The 100 (9PM, CW)

Bitter Harvest

“Clarke (Eliza Taylor) is torn between vengeance and mercy. Meanwhile, Kane (Henry Ian Cusick) and Octavia (Marie Avgeropoulos) work together to avert a disaster, and Abby (Paige Turco) continues to worry about Raven (Lindsey Morgan). Isaiah Washington, Bob Morley, Devon Bostick, Christopher Larkin, Richard Harmon, Ricky Whittle also star.”


Shaolin Mantis (9:45PM, EL REY)

Classic 1978 Shaw Bros. production with an excellent trailer, linked above. A man learns martial arts by observing a preying mantis!


Colony (10PM, USA)


“Broussard (Tory Kittles) questions his mentor, while separately Katie (Sarah Wayne Callies) feels cut off from her family and her cell. During his hunt for the Resistance, Will (Josh Holloway) comes even closer to discovering the truth. Up in the Green Zone, Maddie (Amanda Righetti) finds herself entangled in a seductive relationship. Finally, Snyder (Peter Jacobson) keeps his word, giving Will and Katie a glimmer of hope.”


Also on Thursday: Clarence (5PM, CARTOON), We Bare Bears (7PM, CARTOON), You, Me and the Apocalypse (8PM, NBC), Elementary (CBS, 10PM), Prey (10PM, BBC AMERICA), Vikings: Kill The Queen (10PM, HISTORY)


Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon: Sword of Destiny (3:01AM, NETFLIX)

A band of legendary warriors protects a 400-year-old sword known as “The Green Destiny.” Here’s the long-awaited sequel (16 years!) to the once extremely popular 2000 movie, that’s somehow faded from the cultural consciousness faster than the Oh, God! movies.


Sleepy Hollow (8PM, FOX)

Sins of the Father

“When Jenny makes the decision to confront her father, family turmoil from the past rises to the surface. Meanwhile, Atticus Nevins returns to town, bringing more danger than the FBI could have imagined.”


As noted last week, this time it’s Sleepy Hollow’s turn to borrow the most commonly used episode title of all time.

The Vampire Diaries (8PM, CW)

Moonlight on the Bayou

“In order to lure a vengeful vampire hunter named Rayna Cruz (guest star Leslie-Anne Huff) away from his friends in Mystic Falls, Stefan (Paul Wesley) heads to New Orleans, where Valerie (guest star Elizabeth Blackmore) has learned of a safe house that can protect him. Once there, he comes face to face with Klaus Mikaelson (guest star Joseph Morgan), who soon becomes suspicious of his old friend’s unexpected arrival in his city. Meanwhile, Enzo (Michael Malarkey), who is working on behalf of a mysterious organization called The Armory, approaches Damon (Ian Somerhalder) and Bonnie (Kat Graham) with a plan that could protect Stefan from Rayna. Finally, after learning that Alaric (Matt Davis) has decided to leave for Dallas with the twins immediately, Caroline (Candice King) offers to accompany them on the trip and finds herself contemplating her own future in Mystic Falls.”


The Originals (9PM, CW)

A Streetcar Named Desire

“With the threat of the prophecy looming over their heads, Klaus (Joseph Morgan) and Elijah (Daniel Gillies) find themselves rendered useless inside a magical trap, while Aya (guest star Tracy Ifeachor) and The Strix’s coven of witches move forward with a risky spell that could take one of them down for good. Elsewhere, Freya (Riley Voelkel) leads the charge to get her brothers back and enlists the help of Marcel (Charles Michael Davis), Hayley (Phoebe Tonkin) and Stefan Salvatore (guest star Paul Wesley), an old friend of Klaus’, whose unexpected arrival may be the key to their survival. Finally, Davina (Danielle Campbell) moves forward with a dangerous plan that brings her one step closer to reuniting with Kol.”


Also on Thursday: Fuller House: The Complete First Season (Netflix, 3:01AM), Pig Goat Banana Cricket (8:30PM, NICK), Second Chance (9PM, FOX)


The Lone Ranger (9PM, SYFY)

If you missed this movie in theaters, time to flip the bird (on your head) to all the people who think this movie is a godawful trainwreck. Or maybe, join them.


Svengoolie (10PM, MeTV)

The Mummy (1932)

“Do you have to open graves to find girls to fall in love with?”

Also on Saturday: Transformers: Robots in Disguise (6:30AM, CARTOON), Pokemon: XYZ (7AM, CARTOON), Bunnicula (9:30AM, CARTOON), Be Cool, Scooby-Doo! Saga of the Swamp Beast (10:30AM, CARTOON), Power Rangers: Dino Super Charge (12PM, NICK), Game Shakers (8PM, NICK), Mythbusters: The Reddit Special (8PM, DISCOVERY), Black Sails (9PM, STARZ), Beowulf (10PM, ESQUIRE)


Guardians of the Galaxy (8:30AM, DISNEY XD)

Crystal Blue Persuasion

“The Guardians get caught up amongst the Inhuman Royal Family and must help save the City of Attilan from Ronan.”


Ultimate Spider-Man vs The Sinister Six (9AM, DISNEY XD)

Miles From Home

“When Doc Ock and Baron Mordo use the Siege Perilous to pull in the Goblin from another universe, Spider-Man enlists the help of Miles Morales and Doctor Strange to try to keep reality from collapsing.”


That’s possibly the most “sci-fi” thing on all week. Whoa!

The Walking Dead (9PM, AMC)

Knots Untie

“After Rick comes to the realization that Alexandria might not be as safe as he thought, decisions must be made about where to go from here.”


Special appearance by zombie Don Knotts!

Also on Sunday: Yu-Gi-Oh! (10AM, NICKTOONS), Vinyl (9PM, HBO) Venture Bros.: Tanks For Nuthin’ (12AM, CARTOON)

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Angrier Geek

I’m watching Legends of Tomorrow strictly for the fan service like Old Green Arrow, because the story is the dumbest, laziest piece of superhero writing I’ve seen since Smallville.