Ramsay Bolton enjoying a sausage.
Image: HBO

How much money would you pay to say that you ate meat loosely inspired by Theon Greyjoy’s severed junk?

As reported by Washingtonian, a Maryland casino is offering Game of Thrones fans an opportunity to experience what can only be described as eating foods whose descriptions are a pale comparison to the kinds of sumptuous cuisine that George R.R. Martin is so fond of describing in vivid, exhausting detail in his books. Included on the “Throne of Games” brunch menu (which HBO almost certainly was not consulted about, and probably won’t appreciate) includes classics like “Scrambled Dragon Eggs,” “Ygritte’s Grits,” and the poorly-named “Theon’s Sausage,” which again, is a joke about a guy getting his dick cut off by a sociopath who may or may not have then eaten said dick.

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Poor taste aside, what’s really disappointing about the menu is a utter lack of proper creativity—not to mention its refusal to offer up the kinds of foods that Game of Thrones’ characters are actually eating right now. Winter has come and the dead are preparing to wipe out the living. You know what most people are going to be eating in Westeros when Game of Thrones returns on on April 14? Gruel. They’re shoveling down gruel and vermin, and guzzling whatever wine and ale they can find.


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