This scene from the original cowboys/aliens film would make Jon Favreau have a heart attack. Especially the space dominatrix and the lizard gunfighter, who tells Julie Newmar's cat-woman: "No sense in messing up such a prime pussy." Err... what?


I love the part where the whip-holding lady, Lash, has her two man-friends tear her conservative cloak off to reveal her leather chaps. And one of her friends is a Matador named Wormhole. Because, why not? The 1994 space cowboy movie Oblivion has everything. Claymation scorpions? Check! Lizard with red plastic eyepatch named Red-Eye? Check! Dominatrix in leather chaps? Hell yeah!

Seriously, we're sure that Favreau's Cowboys And Aliens movie will be the polar opposite of Oblivion — as was Firefly, Joss Whedon's space Western. In fact, Oblivion could serve as an object lesson on what not to do with the space Western — it's loaded down with campiness worse than a mule coming out of a silver mine.


And yes, that is Julie Newmar as Miss Kitty. The movie has an all-star cast, including George Takei as Doc Valentine and Isaac Hayes as "Buster." Written by Peter David, the script is jam-packed with obscure nerd references that probably made David giggle to himself at his typewriter — at one point, there's an obscenely long speech about a deadly creature, which turns out to be called the manding, which drags on and on until we get to the punchline — "and whatever knows fear burns at the man-ding's touch."

And there are the moments where George Takei looks at a bottle of Jim Beam and says:

Or when Takei says:

The movie does have one good central idea — Zack Stone, the son of the marshall you see being killed in the above scene, is considered a coward because he won't kill anybody. But he's not a coward — he's an empath, who feels any pain he causes, and it hurts him too much to feel the dying spasms of the people he's killed. That's a really nifty conceit, and it works quite well in the Western context — despite being smothered with ten kinds of cheese.

Oh, and apparently they made a sequel!

Here's the trailer:

[Thanks to Shockya for pointing us to this gem]

Illustration for article titled The Original Cowboys And Aliens Movie

Share This Story

Get our newsletter