Please Make a Superhero Origin Story Out of the Naked Wolf Man Eurovision Performance

As most of the io9 staff is American, our knowledge of Eurovision is very poor. But we do know that it’s a crime that Belarus has been knocked out and can’t win the whole thing.

As much of a shame as it that IVAN (or, as we’ve taken to calling him “Belarusian Legolas”) didn’t advance to the Eurovision finals, we’ve decided that this video has more than enough to make an excellent comic book.


Ironically, the story starts where the performance ends: a baby getting hit by lightning:

We presume the lightning gives him powers like duplicating himself:




And the ability to talk to animals:


Of course, the ability to communicate with animals comes with the possibility of forgetting who you are, hence the naked howling. The song title, “Help You Fly,” either references our hero’s attempts to lift up the world or a struggle where he thinks he’s a momma bird teaching chicks to fly.

Here’s the full performance. Full disclosure, we’ve been watching it on loop for hours. It’s not the most addictive Eurovision performance we’ve ever seen, but it’s our favorite of 2016.

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About the author

Katharine Trendacosta

Katharine is the former managing editor of io9.