Low-brow director Ed Wood is best known for his films like Glen or Glenda, Bride of the Monster, and, most notoriously, Plan 9 from Outer Space. But he also wrote prose fiction, including a tale of Egyptian archaeological horror written from the mummy's point of view.

Boing Boing has the full text of The Day The Mummy Returned, a story by Wood that hasn't seen print since it was first published in 1971. It is part of Blood Splatters Quickly, a new collection of 32 of Wood short stories, available for preorder from OR Books.


Here's a small taste of the full tale:

The Day The Mummy Returned

by Edward D. Wood, Jr.

From the cloudy skies... Far across the snow covered mountain ranges... Far from the ocean's roar, where the sun beats its torture on desert sands and the pyramids nestle near the guarding Sphinx, lays the tomb of the Pharaohs...

She of the golden hair has only fallen to the ground in a deep faint.

Three thousand years have passed since I was placed here in my tomb, to remain forever.

Now, infidels tear away the sands… the sands of endless time…

They break the great doors of my tomb… They enter the very vault of my final rest.

I can hear them. A young man! His voice is steady… strong… An older man; his voice reflecting wisdom. There is a third voice. That of a young woman. Her voice thrills with excitement as she stares at what she and they see…

Sights not witnessed by human eyes since before the great pyramids!

Then her voice squeals in alarm… Something has fallen and caused her shock.

The older one speaks of a skull fallen from a great pile of bones. That would be the skull of my High Priest Talau — he who died so that he might travel with me across the River of the Dead and intercede for me the Land of the Dead. He died in vain.

The pile of bones… Court Guards who died so that they might protect My Royal Person in the Land of the Dead, as they had protected Me so bravely in the land of the living. They died in vain.

Some were ordered to spear others… and others in turn were ordered to spear them… and so on until only one was left to suffocate when the air was gone. But that one was not to leave the Land of Mortals in this way. The Fire God, burning fiercely from an overturned urn, encased him first as he writhed upon the tomb floor.


Short story by Plan 9 from Outer Space auteur Ed Wood, Jr. [Boing Boing]