Mulder Got High as Balls on Last Night's X-Files

Honestly, that’s kind of all I remember about the plot of “Babylon.” It was, plot-wise, pretty unremarkable. Except for Mulder’s mushroom samba in the middle.

The plot in a nutshell is a that there was a terrorist attack in Texas, and the FBI has a culprit in a coma. The bureau needs to question him so that he can lead agents to his co-conspirators. Unfortunately, suspect is super-close to death. That brings agents Einstein (Lauren Ambrose) and Miller (Robbie Amell), a kind of proto-Mulder and Scully team, to the door. Einstein gives Mulder drugs to open his mind and so that he can connect with the suicide bomber’s unconscious.

And that’s when Mulder loses it, while we, the audience, are all forced to endure “Achy Breaky Heart” and “Honky Tonk Badonkadonk.” Thank god this was happening:


And this:

Because the music would have been unbearable otherwise. The end of this episode was the first time in a while that I was happy to hear the Lumineers’ “Hey Ho,” which I thought had been beaten to death.

I will give this episode credit for two other things 1) high Mulder is exactly the right way to bring back the Lone Gunmen, rather than trying to randomly resurrect them 2) the fact that this trip was all Mulder, since Einstein gave him a placebo. No one is more suggestible than Mulder, and this is where his brain went the second he believed he was high. “I want to believe,” indeed.


But other than that, it was a pretty meh episode. No one’s going to be clamoring for a spinoff with Ambrose and Amell as discount Mulder and Scully, that’s for sure.

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“Meh” is far too kind.

This episode was absolute dogshit, the only real COMPLETE failure of the “Event Series.”

Tons of plot points brought up and never addressed/resolved. Offensive Muslim stereotypes (every one that appears on-screen is either an Islamic terrorist or the mother of a terrorist). No explanation except “I guess God made this happen or some shit?”

Fuck this episode. This series has made one of the best in the series history (Mulder and Scully Meet the Were-Monster) and now, one of the worst.