Welcome back to Toy Aisle, io9's weekly roundup of shiny toys and merch we desperately wish we had the money to waste on. This week is getting a bit life-sized, with a giant Star Wars trooper, a slightly less giant (but still life-sized) baby Groot, and a cool look at Thor’s new Infinity War weapon. Check it out!
If you’ve ever encountered someone dressed in full Stormtrooper regalia in real life, they’re a lot more intimidating than they seem in the Star Wars movies. And the risk of running into a Death Trooper cosplayer, with their all-black, murdered-out armor, is what has kept us from visiting comic cons ever since Rogue One premiered. It also means we won’t be dropping $8,000 on Sideshow’s new life-size Death Trooper figure when pre-orders start on March 29. But if you have room for an 84-inch tall collectible, and don’t mind being occasionally scared to death in the middle of the night when you bump into this thing, by all means, add it to your collection.
Most of Hot Toys’ 10 to 12-inch figures are tiny, sixth-scale replicas of popular characters. But the company’s new Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2-era 10-inch Groot figure ends up being a life-size representation of everyone’s favorite walking, talking branch. Groot won’t be available for a few months, but he’ll include 15 points of articulation, and some fantastic faux-wood detailing, which makes up for the lack of any included accessories or swappable boy parts.
Now that the TSA has made it a pain to fly with a smart suitcase, demanding passengers take out the batteries before boarding, you’re probably not going to have much luck with this 24-inch Iron Man-themed suitcase. It looks like a limbless version of Tony Stark, but the light up Arc reactor on the front manages to cancel out any creepiness. The fabric liner emblazoned with all the Avengers’ logos also makes this case’s $132 price tag a little easier to swallow, and if you’re willing to just take the bus everywhere you travel, the battery inside it won’t be an issue.
The original Planet of the Apes turns 50 years old in 2018, and if any film is well-suited to Super7's line of minimally-articulated retro ReAction figures, it’s Charlton Heston’s cautionary tale about letting the monkeys get too cocky. Available starting in April for $15 each, wave one of the line includes Cornelius, Dr. Zaius, General Ursus, Nova, Zira, and a very shirtless George Taylor. If you’ve lamented never being able to buy a scantily-clad Charlton Heston action figure, now’s your chance.
Diamond Select’s action figure line of Marvel characters can usually give the Legends line a run for its money, but this time it’s the statue line that’s giving us an interesting look at Thor’s new weapon in Infinity War: Stormbreaker, named for the magical hammer wielded by Beta Ray Bill in the comics. Coming in at nine inches tall, this electrified Thor is joining Thanos, Captain America, Black Widow, Spider-Man, Rocket Raccoon, and the new Hulkbuster in a line of PVC statues due out in September, so... start clearing some shelf space now. [Toyark]
Just like with new seasons of Supernatural, the world’s demand for new versions of Monopoly will never run out. Following up on the “gamer” version of the classic board game, which introduced Nintendo characters and properties into the mix, the new Mario Kart Edition of Monopoly brings Mario, Peach, Luigi, and Toad to your Friday night family time. In this version of Monopoly, available sometime this spring for $25, players hop between iconic Mario Kart locales like Rainbow Road as they move across the board, but victory isn’t determined by who has the most cash and hotels in the end. Instead, players work to win races, points, and a Grand Prix card, using power-ups similar to what’s in the video game.