Despite the title and some amusing scenes, most of “Real Dead Housewife of Seattle” was brutally hard to watch. This was an episode that revealed how awful Liv and Major’s lives are.

Spoilers. . .

The murder of the week is, as the title suggests, a moneyed housewife. “I’ve never lunched on a lady who lunches” says Liv. The important thing about the murder is that the victim’s husband is a board member at Max Rager and, when they visit, Liv unfortunately gets an eyeful of this year’s big villain, Vaughn Du Clark (Steven Weber, who is loving this role so much) banging the housewife.

Hey, if I had to see it, so do you. Just be glad it isn’t a GIF.

During the investigation, Clive and Liv meet the victims’ awful friends and the husband’s personal stylist, Bethany. High on housewife brains and her own loneliness, Liv bonds with Bethany—just in time for Clive to find out she’s the murderer.

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Normally, that would suck all on its own. But the episode piles two things onto it to underscore just how isolated Liv is: the return of Peyton and the reveal, right as Liv meets Bethany for a girls’ day out, that it is Liv’s birthday. Peyton tells no one she’s back, Liv and Ravi find out from a press conference putting her in charge of eliminating the Utopium dealers (well, no way that’s going to be relevant, given Utopium’s connection to zombie-ism and Major’s new addiction).

While Ravi gets to have an uncomfortable hug with Peyton right after he’s gone on a date, Liv never connects with her.

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Liv makes plans to go to the drinks and seafood restaurant, Finn and Juice, with Bethany, and Rose McIver plays a heartbreaking desperation and vulnerability underneath the vapidness of the housewife brains she’s on. Which is why it is Clive’s cue to call her with the news that her new friend is a murderer.

The episode ends with Liv drinking spicy alcohol alone, but finding a birthday cake that Peyton dropped off. So there is hope for that friendship yet.

Emotionally, this was great. I have one quibble: Ravi’s not a friend she could share her birthday with? I guess it’s not the same as having her best friend. (Edited to add: I did mean that she didn’t tell anyone it was her birthday. Which was weird.)

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As for Major:

I wish I had had this GIF for all of last season. That said, the scene of him driving out to the bridge to kill a zombie was awful to watch. The guy’s begging from the trunk with his dog looking balefully at Major (whoever chose the basset hound: nice call. Baleful is that breed’s default setting). We know too well by now that fed zombies are no more good or bad than any other person. And this is clearly taking a toll on Major.

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Who is, by the way, still taking Utopium, working out in the Max Rager gym, and hooking up with Gilda, the Max Rager spy living with Liv, to dull the pain. Also, he keeps the dog.

Let’s end this recap on an up note: Steven Weber:

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Between him and David Anders, iZombie is killing it on the villains. Weber is in this episode a lot, and he is hilarious, awful, and hilariously awful. That little wave is in response to Liv asking Major how he can be working for him at Max Rager.

Here he is casually dodging Liv’s thrown water:

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And here he is reacting to her insult:

He is so delightfully smarmy that, while you’re not rooting for him, you’re looking forward to him getting lots of screentime as he goes down.

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Also he says Gilda exists because he sleeps with other rich guys’ wives, which I think means she’s his daughter? And he feeds another guy to a zombie. Creepy dude.

Oh, and by the way, show? Don’t think I didn’t catch the Veronica Mars reference. “A long time ago, we used to be friends,” really?


Contact the author at katharine@io9.com.

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