Witness the best of the worst of cheap CG space battles. 2000's Starforce doesn't just boast atrocious CG and awesome "pew-pew-pew" sound effects, it also features incredible acting and accents that change from line to line. Update: Videos fixed!

To be fair, Starforce does have a plot, of sorts. Michael Bergin plays Zed Lucene, who you see as a small boy in the clip above. The big beardy man who rescues him from the space raiders raises him as his own son, leading to a montage of the man and the boy, nearly naked, trying to knock each other down — because the foster dad is training Zed to be a warrior. When Zed is grown up, he joins the Starforce, like his foster dad before him, but he doesn't fit in because he had parents and wasn't just bred for combat, blah blah blah. And then it turns out there's some Tritium on a planet somewhere and everybody wants it, because it's a super power source, and Zed meets up with Princess Nippleage, who wears a see-thru top all the time, and together they face these plastic lobsters that try to attach themselves to your face and squee at you. Almost everybody except for Beardy Man and Princess Nippleage turns out to be a villain in the end. This IMDB review actually sums it up quite well:

This is awful!The CGI is home PC stuff and don't get me started on the lobster like creatures in the cave! The actors are wooden and miss cast. The lame script is straight out a spate western with lines being delivered with sneering expressions and a big sigh. Truly a waste of film and I thought Post Impact was the worst movie I had seen!What was the budget? It would have better spent on a Pizza and Star Wars Video from 1976! Watch this movie but only if you got it free! ... I was discussing movies with an old school friend of mine yesterday and the subject of worst movies came up. You guessed it we both said Star Force! hahahahahahaha We watched it again and laughed so much I nearly spilled my beer!


Here's another taste of those fantastic cheap space battles. It's so ugly it's beautiful, in a kind of cheap cut-scene sort of way: