Our watch has ended, and now my walk of shame begins. The eighth and final season of Game of Thrones is over, and the final death count has been tallied (Valar Morghulis). We started off the season with so many characters. Some of them died, but others lived—frankly, way more than I expected.
Last year, I released this video and article proudly declaring that I knew who was going to survive or perish in the final season of Game of Thrones. Oh, what a sweet summer child I turned out to be. There were some expected deaths, along with a few twists and turns—including a few I really should’ve trusted my gut on, hello Daenerys Breaking Bad Targaryen!
Luckily, io9's now-famous Hall of Faces, aka that whiteboard I stuck a bunch of character faces on, survived the year and was just waiting for me to give a proper and accurate sendoff. Let’s begin. Shame. Shame. Shame.
Fate: She broke bad, folks. She broke bad hard. I had a feeling that would happen but allowed my silly Disney fantasy dreams to cloud my judgement.
Fate: He killed Daenerys Targaryen for the aforementioned badness, and got sent to Castle Black to live out the rest of his sad lonely days. But the series ended with him traveling North of the Wall with the wildlings, so it’s possible he’s just peaced out on Westeros entirely.
Fate: I didn’t not predict any of the animals’ fates, but I was wrong. Quite wrong. I should’ve known Ghost would be important to the Battle at Winterfell. At least he got his pets.
Fate: Queen in the North, suckers.
Fate: I thought Bran embracing his fate as the Three-Eyed Raven would mean he would become immortal and turn into a tree god. But actually, it means becoming King of the Now-Six Kingdoms. Twist?
Fate: She’s on an epic road trip, and I wish her well.
Fate: Didn’t think any of Daenerys’ other dragons would die, but lo and behold a giant crossbow was enough to down Rheagal. Drogon survived, though.
Fate: Drogon’s worst enemy! It was some sweet melting action.
Fate: Turns out, the most dangerous thing for a queen is falling rocks.
Fate: See above.
Fate: When you’re Tyrion Lannister you can do anything...including choosing Westeros’ new ruler, while handcuffed. Tyrion is now the reluctant Hand of the King, forever destined to move chairs around and never finish that joke about that one time he went into a brothel.
Fate: He sacrificed himself for the sake of his family, and his home, and he died a hero.
Fate: She’s now the Lady of the Iron Islands, serving King Brandon the Broken—although I’m sure she and that new Dornish prince are giving that whole Six Kingdoms a side-eye, now that Sansa’s made the North independent without a problem.
Fate: This one was the biggest surprise to me. After she was knighted by Jaime Lannister, I swore that meant she was going to die in the Battle at Winterfell. But instead, she’s leading the Kingsguard and has a seat on the small council. That said, out of everybody on the series who surprisingly survived, she’s the one I’m happiest about. No one deserves joy more than Brienne.
Fate: A dick like Podrick’s couldn’t go to waste.
Fate: Apparently, he’s Lord of Horn Hill now—even though he swore an oath to the Night’s Watch and, unlike Jon Snow, didn’t die so he could get out of it. I guess King Bran has the ability to un-oath someone, so now he gets to sit on the small council and write books with ridiculously pointed titles.
Fate: She’s happily with Samwell and pregnant with their child.
Fate: We’d had enough Craster Baby deaths on this show, you monsters.
Fate: She may have died heroically defeating an undead giant during the Battle at Winterfell, but Lyanna Mormont the Bear Queen of All is still alive and thriving in my fanfic. And no, you can’t read it.
Fate: Sure, this guy. Why not.
Fate: Jorah Mormont sacrificed himself to save Daenerys during the White Walker invasion. It’s what his whole life had been building toward and it was a heroic death for one of the show’s most complex characters.
Fate: He’s also on the small council. Davos lived. I called it.
Fate: He survived—against basically every odd there is—and is now heading back North of the Wall with Jon and the other wildlings. He had to say goodbye to Ser Brienne, but I’m sure he’s going to be just fine.
Fate: Daenerys named Gendry Baratheon the rightful heir of Robert Baratheon and the new Lord of Storm’s End, because she felt like it. Even though she’s not queen anymore, because of the whole being dead thing, apparently this one sticks. Bran’s cool with it, I guess.
Fate: I liked Bronn, most of us did. But he was useless in the final season. Walked around with a crossbow and then...that’s it. He’s on the small council now, trying to get money for brothels while being a gigantic doofus.
Fate: I refuse to believe Varys was actually killed by Drogon’s dragon fire for betraying Daenerys. Varys dwells in the space between spaces. You cannot kill someone who does not exist.
Fate: Well, if Ellaria wasn’t dead before the sack of King’s Landing, she surely is now. No one bothered to check on her.
Fate: He was brought back to be the butt of a joke. Thanks show.
Fate: After losing everything he’d worked so hard for, including the love of his life, he decided to head to Naath to visit Missandei’s home country. Too bad it’s probably going to kill him within, like, an hour of showing up. In the books, Naath is deadly to outsiders because of a poisonous butterfly species.
Fate: She was fridged so Daenerys would be pissed off enough to blow up King’s Landing. Doing this to the show’s only black female protagonist was a mistake.
Fate: Once Daenerys left Essos, no one there mattered anymore.
Fate: I guess he could be anyone, technically.
Fate: This was another big mistake, never following up with what happened to Meera Reed after she left Winterfell. I even made the mistake myself, by not mentioning her in my discussion about all the questions Game of Thrones would never answer. One more dose of shame for me, please.
Fate: Damn, there are a lot of characters the show stopped caring about. Yohn Royce was more important than Hot Pie? Really?
Fate: Still chilling in one of the safest places in the world.
Fate: He knew his fate was to die in service of the Lord of Light, helping to bring an end to darkness. By sacrificing himself to help Arya Stark escape, he did exactly what he was meant to do.
Fate: She used her magic to help fight off the White Walkers and found peace for finally doing the right thing, walking off into the distance to die in the early morning light.
Fate: He fucked the queen and then died for it.
Fate: God, this death was so satisfying. The Mountain was all, like: “Outta my way, I’ve got things to do.”
Fate: Hey buddy, there’s someone behind you.
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