Illustration for article titled Dont Worry, There Will Definitely Be A emGuardians Of The Galaxy/em Porn

Despite the plethora of Marvel's Phase 3 news yesterday, there was one question on everyone's minds that remained unanswered: Will GotG get a porn parody? The answer, happily, is yes. Porn purveyor WoodRocket is already "hard" at work on Gnardians of the Galaxy: 50 Shades of Groot. Seriously.


I have so many questions. How are they going to do Rocket? (I assume they're not using a live raccoon.) How many "wood" jokes are they going to make about Groot? Will Nova Prime get a fuck scene, and if so, with whom? Why isn't it called Gangbangers of the Galaxy instead of the nonsense word "Gnardians"? We'll presumably find out in a few weeks. Ooga chaka indeed, my friends.

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