Domo Arigato, Kid Robot Movies

Paramount Pictures’ kid brother, Nickelodeon, has designs on turning some of those badass graffiti-influenced Kid Robot toys into, we can only hope, badass graffiti-influenced cinema. According to Variety, Kid Robot's parent company, W!ldbrain Incorporated—which already produces the hipster Yo Gabba Gabba! kids show for Nick Jr.—will work with the studio on these movie projects that will be a "mix of animation and live action." (Hasbro, incidentally, announced similar intentions late last year to extract more lucre out of their arsenal of playthings.) Just who will script this exercise in potential awesomeness? And which action figures will get the big-screen treatment? Kid Robot and Paramount won’t say yet. So we're offering some suggestions.


Toy: Smorkin’ Labbit Pitch: V meets The Insider meets Crank. In an effort to kick his cigarette habit, the Labbit visits a hypnotherapist. A particularly probing session taps deep into his subconscious: Turns out he’s an alien leproid planted on Earth to be a remote assassin—his “fuse” a nic fit!—waiting to destroy all mankind. Only he’s inadvertently become attached to his human targets…and resolves to save their puny race.

Toy: Munny Pitch: Seven Samurai meets Shane. He is a warrior who traverses the bleak frontier by his lonesome. Along the way, Munny valiently rescues some villagers from local bandits and captures the (innocent and totally platonic, and yet latently homoerotic) heart of a lad, who faithfully studies his idol’s skill set. The kid learns how to be a man; our hero learns how to be a sensei.


Toy: Dunny Pitch: Die Hard meets itself. Dunny is a nice-guy window washer at a downtown Manhattan skyscraper. While faithfully doing his job, he looks through a window and notices the employees inside gagged, tied up, and held at gunpoint. Clearly, they are communists! Not one to waste time, he opens a can of Yippie-Kai-Yay on their asses. Images courtesy of [via Daily Variety]

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