Boll to Spielberg: I Will Crush You Like The Hack You Are

Illustration for article titled Boll to Spielberg: I Will Crush You Like The Hack You Are

It had to happen - Uwe Boll has finally gone completely insane. After spending years directing such classics as Bloodrayne, Bloodrayne II and the forthcoming Bloodrayne 3, Boll has laid down the ultimate challenge with new movie Postal: It's going to open head to head with Indiana Jones and The Kingdom of the Crystal Skull... and beat it at the box office. Wild claims and smack talking await under the jump.


In an email reprinted over at Bloody Disgusting, Boll lays down the challenge in his own particular manner:

On the Indiana Jones weekend - May 23 - we will go out and destroy Indiana Jones in the Box Office! We all know that Harrison Ford is older as my grandpa and his time is up - would Michael Moore say!


Michael Moore? What? Wait, it gets better:

Spielberg gets sloppy. We saw that with War of the Worlds (why the fuck the older brother survived?) and also in parts of Jaws, E.T., Munich etc.! My performance in Postal as 'Nazi Theme Park Owner' outperforms easily Ben Kingsley in Schindler's List!

I love that Jaws is proof of Spielberg getting sloppy. "See? Even in his first real movie, he was getting worse!" Now, Boll isn't the kind of guy to react well to bad press (responding to a bad review by telling a reviewer "you dont see courage because you are nothing. and no go to your mum and fuck her ...because she cooks for you now since 30 years she deserves it," for example), so here's hoping that he's prepared for the disappointment that's undoubtedly due on May 23rd, when both movies open.

Uwe Boll Sets 'Postal' to Release Against Indiana Jones [Bloody Disgusting]


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A.I. was a brilliant film until it kept going for three quarters an hour after the real ending with the boy-bot sunk at the bottom of the ocean staring at a plaster fairy forever.