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Best Unsung Filk Ever, in Honor of Star Wars Holiday Special

Illustration for article titled Best Unsung Filk Ever, in Honor of Star Wars Holiday Special

Today is the 30th anniversary of the ill-fated TV experience known as the Star Wars Holiday Special. Featuring a group of Wookiees trying to celebrate the holidays while being hassled by Imperial troops - along with song-and-dance numbers and comedy bits in a variety show format - the two-hour special was deemed so hideous that it was never aired again. Luckily you can celebrate this day of infamy with a little help from Shawn Moynihan, managing editor of Editor & Publisher, who has sent us a little song . . .
Here is Shawn's original musical tribute, intended to be sung to the tune of "Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band":

It was 30 years ago today We didn't have a VCR to play George had given in to CBS Who tried to do Star Wars with less But it didn't take too long to see What a horror it would come to be Holiday Special, aww, you were so bad Wookiees talking with a Shriiwook* sound No subtitles to be found Everything was going awfully wrong Bea Arthur singing cantina songs But that night they introduced you to A bounty hunter in green and blue Holiday Special, aww, you were so bad Malla cooking with a Bantha stew Art Carney brought a gift or two Itchy fantasies to kids' dismay Diahann Carroll where are you today Lumpy watching animated Fett Harvey Korman took one in the head Holiday Special, aww, you were so bad Now Chewie made it home in time For a Life Day chorus line And people, if we've learned a thing, Don't let Carrie Fisher sing Thank the Force that you will never see Lucasfilm release a DVD Holiday Special, aww, you were so bad (* Shriiwook being the language of the Wookiees.)

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We just don't know what to say, Shawn. It's . . . beautiful! And it even has a footnote! Click to view Star Wars Holiday Special [via Wikipedia, source of all information about fiction]

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DISCUSSION

IIRC, The Holiday Special's up somewhere on the Internet, probably on YouTube. I watched it a while ago, well, watched the first few minutes of it. I think I cried Uncle just after the Wookie family had a conversation entirely in Wookie Grunt. Yeah, the Holiday Special's probably the worst Star Wars-related piece George Lucas has ever produced.

But I still uphold, that the worst thing Geoge Lucas has ever produced, period, is still Howard The Duck.