At last, the true inheritor of the Red Dawn franchise has arrived

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The problem with the Red Dawn reboot was there just wasn't enough patriotic racism. Luckily, the yellow cyber-peril movie Dragon Day is here to bring that nationalist paranoia fix we all wanted (?) so much.

That's right, Dragon Day is about how those evil, greedy Chinese are going to cyber-invade America, to collect on our huge national debt. Kind of like cyber-terror repo men. But how could hackers destroy all of America and reduce it to cinders just using computers? Well, did you know ALL COMPUTER CHIPS ARE MADE IN CHINA??? Say no more.


Luckily, there's an NSA guy to lead the Wolverines this time — or the cyberverines, whatever. And even more luckily, it's not Edward Snowden, who is probably helping the Chinese hackers right now!!! They can kill you with a Fitbit! OMG this movie. Further evidence that when it comes to racist techno-thrillers, the United States is KING.

This beauty comes out in November on VOD. Get ready to roll a fat one and chant U-S-A! this winter.

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