And now, the rock bottom of scifi art...The Masters of the Universe.

Illustration for article titled And now, the rock bottom of scifi art...The Masters of the Universe.

During io9's Concept Art Week, we saw the highest echelons of scifi illustration and design. Now that the week's come to a close, it feels right to ease you down to earth with some awesomely bad art...featuring He-Man.

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Of course, we love these stupendously ridiculous illustrations by famed He-Man artist Earl Norem, but it's not the same kind of love that Mossman feels towards Ms. Mossman or Man-E-Faces' first face feels for his third face. No, it's the fugitive kind of love you can only experience when you go to a Taco Bell drive-thru and — instead of a Nachos Grande — the clerk hands you a stack of Asia LPs and a snifter of gasoline. I have no idea what that means, but hey, you can't verbalize emotions this profound. This stuff would make Schopenhauer's head explode.

The below link has these prints in face-melting high resolution. If you're looking to test the strength of your marriage, just wallpaper your bedroom with these images. If your spouse doesn't leave you, you are soulmates.

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I'm kind of surprised they celebrate Christmas in Eternia. I always assumed He-Man was their Christ analogue.

[Toy Jesus via Nerdcore]

Illustration for article titled And now, the rock bottom of scifi art...The Masters of the Universe.


I had no idea He-Man and M.U.L.E. teamed up.

Illustration for article titled And now, the rock bottom of scifi art...The Masters of the Universe.
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Boris Vallejo originally drew this scene, but all these men were naked.

Illustration for article titled And now, the rock bottom of scifi art...The Masters of the Universe.
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Someday I will be forced to explain this scene to my grandchildren. Out of respect for this art, I hope I die before then.

Illustration for article titled And now, the rock bottom of scifi art...The Masters of the Universe.
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Hordak is an alternate dimension version of Weekly World News' Bat-Boy who was adopted by Elton John. Oh yeah, Elton John is also an evil supercomputer.

Illustration for article titled And now, the rock bottom of scifi art...The Masters of the Universe.
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He-Man's friends only hang out with him because he has really good pot.

Illustration for article titled And now, the rock bottom of scifi art...The Masters of the Universe.
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Rodeos in Eternia are fucking epic.

Illustration for article titled And now, the rock bottom of scifi art...The Masters of the Universe.
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He-Man is an utter lame-o, breaking up Skeletor's inaugural ninja-punching contest.

Illustration for article titled And now, the rock bottom of scifi art...The Masters of the Universe.
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This is why NASA hoards all the best telescopes. Would you want the masses' philistine eyes sullying such a spectacle?

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DISCUSSION

malcontent79
Malcontent79

He-Man was such a bizarre, campy property, what with the acid-trip mashup of high-tech with furry underwear, magical ray-guns (WTF) and page-boy haircuts.

I'm gonna stick my neck out and say that this is one that would actually make a kind of badass gritty reboot, in the right hands.

Of course, part of the reboot would have to include changing every one of those ridiculous names, up to and including "He-Man". I thought that was weird even when I was six.

Anyway, that wrapping paper alone will probably give me nightmares tonight. *grin*