The Jurassic World trailer gave us some amazing dinosaur action, but also raised lots of questions. We've broken it down, frame by frame, to try and find some answers. And we need to have a serious discussion about Chris Pratt's raptor biker gang. Wild speculation ahead!
The Jurassic World trailer was a very emotional experience for all of us. Especially when the piano started plinking away at the Jurassic Park theme. However, there are some lingering questions that need to be addressed. For now, let's start at the beginning.
A pair of brothers, why ever would we be meeting these brothers? Hello audience entry point. Also hello little kid from Iron Man 3.
Judy Greer and that guy from The Office are in this? Great. Love her.
Your first look at "the island." And how park guests get to said island. Apparently it's by boat.
But once inside the park it looks like the whole thing is run by tram. Personal Ford Explorers are OVER — all guests ride the monorail! Or tram, or whatever it is.
Brand new, re-branded doors. Not really sure why they are keeping the term Jurassic, but who cares, I know what that means. As you can see inside the doors, the whole thing is set up with a railway running through it.
And the park is slammed with tourists. Note the many folks in the tan hats, I suspect these folks are park rangers. Also note the many different languages displayed in the sign. I'm guessing a dinosaur park would be a fairly large attraction. But did the new owners keep John Hammond's vision, and make the entrance price tag low enough for everyone to afford?
And here come the attractions. Driving in fields with dinosaurs! This could possibly be the "Gallimimus Valley," as was noted in a leaked map — although the map was never authenticated.
Kayaking with dinosaurs! The "Cretaceous Cruise?"
Which is basically this badass thing right here.
And now we journey over to the "underwater" part of Jurassic World. This arena is channeling a strong resemblance to Sea World. And if Jurassic World is about to make some not-so-veiled Blackfish references, I am down!
What's for dinner? What appears to be a Great White Shark.
Whats in the tank? A Mosasaurus (according to the never authenticated map that included a "Mosasaurus Feeding Show.")
Don't forget to instagram that shit, people. #jurassicworld
All right, the fun time is over. Now the trailer heads to the other side of the island, the science part, where everyone is flipping dinosaur eggs, looking at amber mosquitos and making terrible, terrible decisions.
Enter Bryce Dallas Howard as the new John Hammond. Her character (named Claire) announces that "they" have created the first ever genetically modified hybrid dinosaur. She says this with the unearned confidence of a oblivious villain who is about to learn a big lesson about playing god THE HARD WAY.
Why a hybrid dinosaur? My only guess is that somehow the studio told the makers of Jurassic World that everyone is tired of old, tired dinosaurs. And that if they want to make this movie, they need to make some sort of insane transformer dinosaur, because why would someone ever want to watch a regular dinosaur? So they gave a dinosaur an upgrade. Cue the hybrid bubble tank of a wired, um, dinosaur spine? I honestly don't know.
Chris Pratt's character (Owen) is suspicious of this idea, "You just went and made a new dinosaur? Probably not a good idea." Ya burnt Bryce.
So far Pratt has the best lines in this trailer. I'm starting to think that his entire dialogue might be made up of "cool guy" sarcasm lines. And that's great coming from a guy wearing leather vest on a tropical island.
Moving on to another Pratt scene, somehow the the hybrid dino was birthed and raised and has already escaped. Now it's up to Pratt (we guess) to pick up the pieces and fix the big mess that the suits upstairs made. The trailer shows 40-foot clawed wall and indicates that the super dino climbed out, for reasons.
This missing dinosaur spells trouble. So the trailer heads to the Jurassic World control room, where Chris Pratt tells Bryce Dallas Howard and her excellent all white pantsuit, "Evacuate the Island."
They are the same person. Get it? You get it.
And now it's super smart dinosaur stalling time. Pratt comes across a mangled gyrosphere! SHOOT HER SHOOOOOOOT HER!
This is Chris Pratt's best "there was a dinosaur here" face.
Fancy tracking watch, is marred by blood drops. It is strongly hinted that the super dino is about to eat this fancy watch, and the person wearing it.
The previously introduced kids are off the beaten path and jumping into waterfalls. This spells both trouble and smacks of Jurassic Park's original plot line. I'm fine with that.
Flare Homage. (Good to see Bryce getting her hands dirty).
First glimpse of the super dinosaur. It has HUGE claws.
Tourists and the boys run away from something frightening.
And now the most pressing moment of the entire trailer. At the very end you hear Pratt's motorcycle rev up. Cut to a bunch of raptors in a cage that are "unleashed." Cut to Pratt riding his motorcycle, THROUGH A JUNGLE.
But Pratt's ability to ride a bike off road through a jungle aside, there are bigger questions here, for instance, why aren't any of the raptors trying to eat Chris Pratt? Why doesn't he look upset/worried about the released raptors. Is this Chris Pratt's RAPTOR PACK?
Early whispers about this Owen character imply that he was hired as a dinosaur trainer. Are these his trained raptors? Is he unleashing his trained raptors to help him hunt down the super dinosaur? Were all previous raptors simply misunderstood, or did this character have to train every ounce of wild out of these beasts to get him to do his bidding. Are we comfortable with that? It seems both wildly unnecessary and needlessly ridiculous. But I can't argue with reading a script that says "Owen revs up his bike and takes off in the woods, his loyal raptor pack screams and runs at his side." I mean that's fucking great, I just don't know how I'm going to believe it. We were trained by Robert Muldoon to respect and fear the raptors. Not make them matching biker jackets. I dunno.
Don't get me wrong, I'm REALLY excited about Jurassic World, especially if they are going to draw parallels to the current places that are abusing and cruelly constricting the animals they have in captivity. We shouldn't be making nature bow to commerce in this grotesque way. This was the theme of the original film, and we all learned that "life finds a way."