So you've turned into a zombie, and you've spent a good deal of time mindlessly eating human flesh. But eventually, you find your tastebuds have gotten bored and you'd really like a glass of something that brings out the flavor of kidneys and skin. But what wines would go best with a dinner of human meat?
In response to the recent infamous Miami "zombie" attack, the Miami New Times asked Tool and A Perfect Circle frontman Maynard James Keenan, who owns both Merkin Vineyards and Caduceus Cellars, what wine would go best with human face. Keenan recommends pinot noir for the cheeks, a big shiraz for the tongue, and beer for the nose and lips.
In response, the Huffington Post decided to contact some wine experts whose knowledge is not associated with things named after pubic wigs. Damien Casten, who runs Chicago-based distributor Candid Wines, opted for the classic zombie delicacy of human brain. According to Casten, the gray matter is best paired with a chenin blanc from Saumur or a chardonnay from the Maconais in Burgundy.
But forget your notions about enjoying a man's liver with a nice chianti, says wine connaisseur Chris McGurn:
"I would personally avoid this, as the Chianti might be a little too light for the fattiness of the liver," he told The Huffington Post. "A Barolo would be a much better choice of Italian wine."
Read about more human flesh/win pairings at the Huffington Post.
No, none of the wines in the top image are real. You can, however, purchase those wine labels from Halloween Adventure, the source of the photo.