Image: Universal.

I have previously asserted that the Fast and the Furious films are in fact a superhero movie franchise where everyone’s superpowers is “cars.” Thanks to this new trailer for the upcoming installment, The Fate of the Furious, I have new evidence backing up my conjecture—namely, Charlize Theron’s villainess summoning whole fleets of cars to do her evil bidding.

Guys, I can’t actually explain how much I love these dumb, wonderful movies if I want to accomplish anything else today, but I will say that my lovely wife and I have said to many family members, friends, and even some new acquaintances, “Have you accepted the Fast and the Furious movies into your life?” We proselytize these things. But I really do believe they’re actual superhero movies. I mean, watch the new F8 trailer, which features the Rock literally altering the path of a torpedo with his hands (while on a car driving at top speed, of course):

If you are interested in hearing the good word and learning to live your life a quarter-mile at a time, email me a self-addressed stamped envelope and I’ll send you my hand-made religious tracts. Fate of the Furious opens April 14.