Good morning, internet. Some of you may already have a burgeoning case of the Mondays, so here's an invention that will immediately make you appreciate your station in life.
The Japan Advanced Institute of Science and Technology has invented a device that allows a person to play "the Pocky game" solo. For those of you unfamiliar with the rules, it requires two people to play chicken with a Japanese chocolate stick, plus the fugitive promise of a make-out session. Yes, this is on par with playing Seven Minutes in Heaven all by your lonesome.
Just think, you could either be A.) playing this game; or B.) the forlorn paper cutout forever consigned to chocolate-smeared indignity. Carpe diem! For more cyber-snogging, see the telepresence kissing machine and the yet-to-be-invented telephone with lips.