The 1991 miniseries Batman vs. Predator was the apotheosis of a great comic crossover, as it contained a prolonged sequence of Batman beating the Predator with a baseball bat. But what if this comic had been a mid-90s total bomb?
For those of you who have never read Batman vs. Predator, it's an easy plot to follow — the Predator comes to Gotham City, and he and Batman alternate whupping each other's asses. Oh, and Alfred plugs the Predator with a goddamn blunderbuss.
Now that you're well-versed in the comic's plot, I'm going to take off my io9 editor camisole for a moment and put on my Uatu the Watcher dirndl as we examine an alternate history from some poor blasted, accursed, hellhole, real Grade-A shitpot alternate Earth. The year is 1996, and Warner Brothers is looking to film a profitable sequel to Batman Forever, a film that sold tickets like gangbusters despite 75% of test audiences thinking it was a two-hour episode of American Gladiators. Seal has won enough Grammys to build a golem out of miniature phonograms, and Val Kilmer has eschewed wearing the tights to self-finance Willow 2: A Madder Martigan. A Batman sequel is inevitable, and Joel Schumacher is in the director's chair.