What's in store this week? New episodes of Lost, Caprica, Chuck, and the 82nd Academy Awards! Will the Academy crown James Cameron the King of the Cat-Men or blow him a big blue raspberry? Watch and see!

NOTE: In honor of this week's Oscars, I'll be inventing a number of awards to bestow upon this week's programming. I may eschew these awards in the coming weeks, just as I eschewed an obvious Avatar-related "blue balls" joke in this week's headline. Hey, we keep it tactful.

MONDAY 3/1/10
First off, we've got the post-Olympic return of Chuck ("Chuck vs The Fake Name") at 8 PM on NBC:

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There's also two new episodes of the anime series Monster (Syfy, 10 and 10:30 PM), but the real gems this evening are the recipients of the first weekly What To Watch WTF Award. This award goes to the National Graphic Channel for airing a triumvirate of weird-ass science shows...

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10 PM - The Whale That Exploded ("A scientific investigation into why a 56-ton sperm whale exploded in a street in Taiwan.")
11 PM - Mystery Bear of the Arctic ("A sports hunter faces possible criminal charges after shooting what appears to be a rare grizzly-polar bear hybrid.")
12 PM - Paranatural Mystery Lights

...and to HBO Family for airing Junior at 11:30 PM. Hey, it's technically a science fiction movie.

Talk Circuit: Astrophysicist Neil DeGrasse Tyson on The Daily Show (Comedy Central, 11 PM), Robert Pattinson on Late Night With Jimmy Fallon (NBC, 12:37 AM), Eli Roth on Last Call With Carson Daly (NBC, 1:36 AM)

TUESDAY 3/2/10
New Lost ("Sundown") at 9 PM on ABC. Looks like we'll have a Sayid/Dogen showdown of sorts.

Tuesday also brings the premiere of two science shows:

- NOVA: "Pluto Files" at 8 PM on PBS. "Neil deGrasse Tyson, director of the American Museum of Natural History's Hayden Planetarium, explores people's opinions about Pluto."
- Explorer Episode: Inside the Nuclear Threat at 10 PM on National Geographic. "The threat of terrorists detonating a nuclear bomb."

The oddballs this evening are a double airing of Underworld Evolution (FX, 8 & 10:30 PM), A Boy and His Dog (The Movie Channel Extra, 1:05 AM), and a Primeval marathon (Syfy, 8 AM-4 PM)

Talk Circuit: Robert Pattinson on The Daily Show, Wesley Snipes (!) and Emilie de Ravin on Fallon.

WEDNESDAY 3/3/10
Not a lot this evening, but we do have What To Watch's Futurama Episode Of The Week! It's " Less Than Hero" (Comedy Central, 9 PM), the episode in which Fry and Leela gain superpowers. While perhaps not the most memorable episode, the antics of Bender's heroic alter-ego Superking make it a worthwhile 30 minutes of your life.

There's a new episode of MonsterQuest ("Piranha Invasion," History, 9 PM), Alien (Turner Classic Movies, 10:15 PM), and The Terminator (AMC, 1:30 AM).

THURSDAY 3/4/10
Reruns of The Vampire Diaries ("Unpleasantville, CW, 8 PM) and Supernatural ("Swap Meat," CW, 9 PM), the hokey Red Planet (AMC, 8 PM), Reign of Fucking Fire (Syfy, 6:30 PM), and a Jake 2.0 marathon (Syfy, 8 AM - 4 PM) round out a fairly blah day.

Talk Circuit: Sonya Walger on The Late Late Show With Craig Ferguson (CBS, 12:37 AM),Mia Wasikowska on Fallon.

FRIDAY 3/5/10
New Caprica (" Know Thy Enemy," Syfy 9 PM)!

Also playing are Smallville reruns ("Rabid" & "Roulette," CW, 8 & 9 PM), 12 Monkeys (AMC, 10:30 PM), From Dusk Till Dawn ("C'mon sex machine!" Encore, 11:30 PM), Alien vs. Predator (FX, 10 PM), and Children of Men (USA, 11:30 PM).

The Awesome Movie On A Non-Basic Cable Channel At A Stupid Time Award goes to The Man Who Fell to Earth (Sundance, 12 AM). No!

SATURDAY 3/6/10
There's a new episode of Survivors (BBCA, 9 PM), The Incredibles (ABC Family, 10 PM), and Final Fantasy: The Spirits Within (HBO Family, 11 PM). C'mon, go out and meet some specimens tonight.

SUNDAY 3/7/10
The 82nd Annual Academy Awards (ABC, 8:30 PM)! I've got next month's rent riding on a dark horse upset from Alvin and the Chipmunks: The Squeakuel.

Join me next week on What To Watch as I gloat about my wildly prescient call that Jason Lee would swipe the Best Actor statuette for his portrayal of Dave Seville from out of the goddamn blue. ALVIN!