The Black Eyed Peas have piled everything that is terrible in today's science fiction into one giant Terminator Salvation-inspired music video. The 10-minute monster is fraught with lens flares, silver masks, plastic capes and break-dancing ray guns.


The following are my responses to the pre-video conversation the Peas are having pre-tin foil battle.

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"Look at this robot outfit!" - Off to a great start already.

"Then the artificial intelligence blah blah blah does some shit." - Lil' Wayne's iphone app is the technology of the future, you guys.

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"So I won't have to rap anymore?" - God willing.

"So you're saying a machine can do anything that an artist or a group can do?" - Well not any artist - but this group specifically, yes.

"This is what is going to take the peas into 3008." - If "The Peas" are around 1000 years in the future, we all have much, much bigger things to worry about.

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"It takes the soul out of it. We're not robots." - Except for that time we dressed up as robots and rode space elephants, and shit. But that was just keepin' it real. And awesome.

Look, it's not that I'm against fun pop music, or The PEAS in general. I don't hate the tune. It's fun for what it is: an itunes top ten anthem. The dancin' was fancy fun times, plus this was 5,000 times more enjoyable than the last Transformers. Let The Peas direct Transformers 3: more robot riffs, less robot balls.

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Maybe we're looking at it wrong. Maybe this whole break dancing robot show down is a meta-interpretation of the music industry today. Why else would they complain that computers are taking your jobs, and then use computers to repeat the one line you sing, in a auto tune robot voice? Well done, Peas - you've made Lady Gaga for idiots, which is saying something. Now scratch-loop that meerkat again and make sure Fergie holds that ray gun gangster style, what what!

UPDATE: As I said in the comments and above I don't hate it, it's just a lot, a lot, a lot. I do like the silver speaker dancer people, you guys can come over anytime. Bring the suits.