The Joy of Cooking Human FleshLauren Davis10/28/08 11:40amFiled to: triviagasmCannibalismFoodHorrorhumanfleshTop531EditPromoteShare to KinjaToggle Conversation toolsGo to permalinkSoylent Green may be made of people, but it’s also delicious. Human meat finds its way onto many a future dinner table and in a vast array of culinary delights. Whether you’re snacking on other folks to survive or just because you like the taste, we've found plenty of cannibalistic dishes to appease your appetite for human flesh.The Time Machine by H.G. Wells: In the future, the spoiled Eloi, descendents of the human race, live in comfort and ease on the Earth’s surface, benefiting from the underground toil of their Morlock cousins. But the Morlocks are hardly slaves to the Eloi; they’re just fattening the surface dwellers for the slaughter. Doomsday: Scottish survivors of a killer plague get terribly excited when visitors from the outside show up on their doorstep. Fresh meat means it’s time for a barbecue. Stranger in a Strange Land by Robert Heinlein: The ritual of cannibalism was a time-honored Martian tradition to show respect to a beloved friend. When Michael Valentine Smith introduces the custom to his followers, some partake, fueling accusations that Smith is leading a freaky cult. Courtship Rite by Donald Kingsbury: When humans settle on the planet Geta, they bring with them bees and eight sacred plants. Geta has a handful of native animals, but they are largely toxic. So, the only eating animals left are human beings, and humanity just isn’t ready to go vegetarian. Torchwood “Countrycide”: What keeps a village happy and cohesive? Shared values? Community service? Regular get-togethers? Or is it that ritual human feast you all partake in every 10 years? Peeps by Scott Westerfeld: Peeps, or Parasite Positives, contract a parasite through sexual contact and promptly lose their minds and develop an irresistible craving for meat. This combination proves deadly to any humans who wander into the paths of the infected. “The Washingtonians” by Bentley Little: George Washington: war hero, patriot, cannibal? That’s right, George Washington became a cannibal during the Revolutionary War, but found the taste of human flesh to his liking. That’s why he became president: not to usher in a new era of democracy, but to convert the nation to his dietary regime. World War Z by Max Brooks: Living through the zombie apocalypse sucks. It’s bad enough that undead are trying to chow down on your flesh, but you also have to deal with survivalists who’ve turned to other humans as sustenance and Z-shock victims who act like they’re zombies, right down to the chewing. “Food of the Gods” by Arthur C. Clarke: Is the cannibalism taboo moral, or does it just give us icky feelings? In a future where all meat is synthetic, and therefore moral, a company starts making Ambrosia Plus, a foodstuff based on a rather familiar animal. When Ambrosia Plus starts outselling the other faux meats, a competitor reveals that, while Ambrosia Plus isn’t made of people, it sure tastes the same. Delicatessen: When trying to survive a post-apocalyptic France, it helps to have a landlord with a steady supply of meat. Just don’t get behind on the rent, or you’ll end up beneath the counter. Doctor Who “The Two Doctors” and “Revelation of the Daleks”: Colin Baker’s Sixth Doctor encounters cannibals in fairly close succession. First, there’s Shockeye, who wants to kill, cook, and eat his fellow sentients Jamie and Peri in “The Two Doctors.” Then in “Revelation of the Daleks,” a mortuary on Necros provides raw material for both new army of Daleks and the food for a starving galaxy. Livewires: Combat robot Stem Cell contains a nanofactory in her innards. When she needs material to construct a host of pyronanos, she consumes her own skin to get it. Firefly: It’s not the Reavers’ fault that they’re all crazy and prone to chewing on their victims; that’s just the Pax. But when you hear Zoe describe it, you realize how much you don’t want to meet one of these fellows. The Twilight Zone “To Serve Man”: Mankind’s new alien friends sound like a real upstanding bunch. They bring humans their wisdom and technology, ending all wars and hunger, and even offer to take a few folks with them to check out the home planet. But their true intentions are revealed in their book “To Serve Man.” Transmetropolitan: In the instant gratification world of Transmetropolitan, anyone can get anything at anytime, provide they have the cash. This even applies to human meat, which comes from brainless bodies grown in bastard farms. And, in addition to fulfilling your nutritional needs, bastard farms can grow you a vice presidential candidate for a nominal fee. Spaceballs: Space gangster Pizza the Hutt gets locked inside his car and eats himself to death. And why wouldn’t he? Look at him: he’s a mountain of pepperoni and cheesey goodness. Soylent Green: Yes, yes, we’re all aware: Soylent Green is people. But it’s so good. But if we don’t watch it being made, can’t we just pretend it’s soy?