Image: WB/DC

I have to get something off my chest—something that has bothered me ever since I saw Wonder Woman. And I believe, strongly, that Steve Trevor lied about the size of his penis to Diana.

In Wonder Woman, there’s a scene at Themiscyra where Steve (Chris Pine) is relaxing naked in a lagoon. Diana (Gal Gadot) comes in and there Steve is, naked, covering the entirety of his manhood in one hand.

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Now, Steve has been made fully aware by basically everything Diana has said to him up to this point that she’s never seen a man before. So when Diana gets the first glance at his completely nude body—appearing to stare with a laser-like focus on his groin—and asks if he’s typical of his kind, Steve answers that he’s “above average.”

It’s certainly true that there are ways in which Steve is above average among men (based on this movie, he’s above average in almost every way). But in this context, in this scene, he is obviously talking about his dick size. It’s barely innuendo.

Here’s the issue: Wonder Woman shows us Steve Trevor standing there, fully nude, but with every single bit of his genitals hidden by a single cupped hand.

And I call bullshit.

The average flaccid penis size is 3.5 inches, which I think yes, might fit in a cupped hand. The average male hand size is 7.44 inches. But Steve also has his balls in his hand. You’d probably see something. Even if he’s only slightly above average, that’s... not a comfortable way to hide a whole dick and both balls.

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So the options here are that he’s lying or he used that hand to hide his dick between his legs. And given how surprised Steve is by Diana, I don’t think it’s the latter. I will admit this is up for debate, but I am also not the only woman who saw this movie and thought he lied.

As a final note, I am not impugning the size of Chris Pine’s dick, here. I’m sure Warner Bros. used CG or a compression sock or something to make sure absolutely no peen was seen on screen. But in the world of the DCEU, either the character of Steve Trevor has a small dick, or he has testicular torsion from quickly jamming his genitalia between his legs.